I was a California beach bunny who married a Canadian rancher—a real cowboy. I wanted surf, he wanted turf. I loved rock and roll, he loved country. I wonder if God laughs out loud when making marriages in heaven.
When I left southern California, I married into a Alberta ranching family. I came to Alberta in go-go boots and a beehive hair-do and stuck out like a wild turkey at a chicken convention. I knew nothing about farming and ranching, it was like Lucille Ball meets Bonanza.
I became a Christian as a child, and have struggled with self- esteem problems much of my life. Sadly the need for acceptance and unconditional love followed me into my new life. As I packed to move to a new country, new occupation and new friends and family, I also packed my old survival kit. In that kit were the masks, and games of my past that I felt I would need to find acceptance and love.
I made myself a survival kit of masks. I could be happy, funny, shy, or confident; I learned to become whatever I thought other people wanted me to be. They would never see the fear and insecurity that made up who I really was. Although I regularly attend church and bible studies, I could never understand God’s love for me. I thought God’s love was for everyone else, not me. I felt unworthy, second rate, and not of any value. In my world things were never as they might have appeared to others. I was afraid if they saw the real me, they wouldn’t like or accept me.
Do you step into the life’s arena everyday wearing masks, striving for right appearance and performing your best for love, acceptance and approval?
The Bible says: I have loved you with an everlasting love.This love is forever, unchanging, and constant.
My desire is for woman of all ages, stages, colors, circumstances and hair color, to know the freedom that comes from knowing God, and the peace He gives when life happens©
Lovingly,
Karan Gleddie
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Karan Gleddie has been sharing her insights and experience with women in all walks of life. You will enjoy her honesty and humor as she shares from her heart.